Post by Hobbit-eyes on Nov 9, 2005 9:20:09 GMT -5
I'm writing a LOTR parody... again. And I liked the old title, so I kept it ;D
LORD OF THE RINGS: THE FELLOWSHIP OF THE RING
Elvish: If you haven't gone to the toilet yet, you're reeeaaally gonna regret it soon.
Galadriel: First of all the elves made some pretty rings to make the world a better place, but surprise surprise, Sauron had to go and mess it up because we didn’t make him one. TYPICAL.
Sauron: BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA-
Galadriel: He made the One Ring to control all the others, and it made the elves over-exposed, the dwarves comic relief, and the men either Dementors or nicely ruggedly sexy. So it wasn’t all bad.
Sauron: -HAHAHAHAHAHA-
People of Middle-earth: *DIE*
Sauron: -HAHAHAHAHA!!!
Galadriel: Then some elves and men tried to stop him. Cute.
Orcs: RAAAAAA-
Elves: *TWANG*
Orcs: AA-urk. You could have let us finish….
Galadriel: Just when their hopes were getting up, Sauron came and killed a load of them by smush. Including Elendil, which was a bit of a bad move.
Isildur: You killed my father! *ringy slicy*
Sauron: *explodes from trying to contain Star Wars reference*
Isildur: … OK, THAT’S never happened before…
Galadriel: Isildur then did the right thing, and destroyed the Ring, and we all lived happily ever after.
… Just kidding.
Isildur: MIIIINE!!!
Ring: *is loffed*
Galadriel: But then they got attacked by some orcs who hadn’t been at the big battle for some reason.
Orcs: OMGONERINGWELOFFYOU *GLOMP*
Isildur: *DIES*
Galadriel: So the Ring went and sat at the bottom of a river for 2500 years. Needless to say, it got a little bored…
Ring: (to a fish) Hey! Wanna enslave humanity?
Fish’s mother: Don’t talk to strange rings, dear.
Fish: Awww…
Galadriel: … until someone came and found it.
Hand: *YOINK!*
Galadriel: So Gollum came and took it to the Misty Mountains where no-one would persecute their love.
Ring: *is loffed*
Darkness: *creeps back into forests of the world*
Rumour: *grows of a Shadow in the East*
Nameless fear: *whispered*
Galadriel: Yeah, stuff sucked. But then the Ring got bored of Gollum’s obsessive relationship.
Ring: For heaven’s sake, Gollum, you haven’t gone out with your friends for 500 YEARS!!! I need SPACE!!! Geez, I’m out of here. Hey cutey, give me a ride?
Bilbo: Er, OK.
Galadriel: So soon stuff won’t suck so much. Whee!
LORD OF THE RINGS: THE FELLOWSHIP OF THE RING
Elvish: If you haven't gone to the toilet yet, you're reeeaaally gonna regret it soon.
Galadriel: First of all the elves made some pretty rings to make the world a better place, but surprise surprise, Sauron had to go and mess it up because we didn’t make him one. TYPICAL.
Sauron: BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA-
Galadriel: He made the One Ring to control all the others, and it made the elves over-exposed, the dwarves comic relief, and the men either Dementors or nicely ruggedly sexy. So it wasn’t all bad.
Sauron: -HAHAHAHAHAHA-
People of Middle-earth: *DIE*
Sauron: -HAHAHAHAHA!!!
Galadriel: Then some elves and men tried to stop him. Cute.
Orcs: RAAAAAA-
Elves: *TWANG*
Orcs: AA-urk. You could have let us finish….
Galadriel: Just when their hopes were getting up, Sauron came and killed a load of them by smush. Including Elendil, which was a bit of a bad move.
Isildur: You killed my father! *ringy slicy*
Sauron: *explodes from trying to contain Star Wars reference*
Isildur: … OK, THAT’S never happened before…
Galadriel: Isildur then did the right thing, and destroyed the Ring, and we all lived happily ever after.
… Just kidding.
Isildur: MIIIINE!!!
Ring: *is loffed*
Galadriel: But then they got attacked by some orcs who hadn’t been at the big battle for some reason.
Orcs: OMGONERINGWELOFFYOU *GLOMP*
Isildur: *DIES*
Galadriel: So the Ring went and sat at the bottom of a river for 2500 years. Needless to say, it got a little bored…
Ring: (to a fish) Hey! Wanna enslave humanity?
Fish’s mother: Don’t talk to strange rings, dear.
Fish: Awww…
Galadriel: … until someone came and found it.
Hand: *YOINK!*
Galadriel: So Gollum came and took it to the Misty Mountains where no-one would persecute their love.
Ring: *is loffed*
Darkness: *creeps back into forests of the world*
Rumour: *grows of a Shadow in the East*
Nameless fear: *whispered*
Galadriel: Yeah, stuff sucked. But then the Ring got bored of Gollum’s obsessive relationship.
Ring: For heaven’s sake, Gollum, you haven’t gone out with your friends for 500 YEARS!!! I need SPACE!!! Geez, I’m out of here. Hey cutey, give me a ride?
Bilbo: Er, OK.
Galadriel: So soon stuff won’t suck so much. Whee!