Post by reasonably_crazy on Dec 7, 2004 22:18:20 GMT -5
My friend Kaitlin read a silly fanfic where Sauron, instead of actually trying to kill his foes, wrote a poem describing their deaths. I, in a bout of boredom, attempted to do the same.
A is for Asfaloth, stepped in a hole
B is for Boromir, ran into a pole
C is for Celeborn, tripped on ROBE’S hem*
D is for Denethor, impaled on his pen
E is for Eomer, fell under his horse
F is for Frodo, drownded by force**
G is for Gwiahir, Thanksgiving meal
H is for Haldir, who choked on his Veal
I is for Ioreth, talked out her tongue
J is for Jackie, a *cough* Hero unsung***
K is for Kaitlin, first gave this a whirl****
L is for Legolas, trampled by Fangirls
M is for Merry, fell in a fountain
N is for Nimrodel, lost in the Mountains
O is for Olorin, who FINALLY was done in
P is for Pippin… slain by Olorin
Q is for Quendi- curse those darn Elves
R is for Radagast- he killed himself.
S is for Strider, sick of being called “sire”<br>T is for Treebeard- he caught on fire
U is for Underhill, the tricky little thing
V is for Vilya, Elrond’s stupid ring
W is for Witchking, killed by a GIRL
X isn’t in the Middle Earth world
Y is for Yavanna, drowned in her cup
Z is for Zamin… YOU look her up.
* NOT a dress! (kind of an inside joke)
** There was talk of Drogo being "drownded." I found it cruelly amusing to think of Frodo going the same way.
*** There are no J's in ME. It's crazy.
**** Kaitlin's my friend, she did the first attempt at one
of these poems.
Note in general: I was very very bored.
A is for Asfaloth, stepped in a hole
B is for Boromir, ran into a pole
C is for Celeborn, tripped on ROBE’S hem*
D is for Denethor, impaled on his pen
E is for Eomer, fell under his horse
F is for Frodo, drownded by force**
G is for Gwiahir, Thanksgiving meal
H is for Haldir, who choked on his Veal
I is for Ioreth, talked out her tongue
J is for Jackie, a *cough* Hero unsung***
K is for Kaitlin, first gave this a whirl****
L is for Legolas, trampled by Fangirls
M is for Merry, fell in a fountain
N is for Nimrodel, lost in the Mountains
O is for Olorin, who FINALLY was done in
P is for Pippin… slain by Olorin
Q is for Quendi- curse those darn Elves
R is for Radagast- he killed himself.
S is for Strider, sick of being called “sire”<br>T is for Treebeard- he caught on fire
U is for Underhill, the tricky little thing
V is for Vilya, Elrond’s stupid ring
W is for Witchking, killed by a GIRL
X isn’t in the Middle Earth world
Y is for Yavanna, drowned in her cup
Z is for Zamin… YOU look her up.
* NOT a dress! (kind of an inside joke)
** There was talk of Drogo being "drownded." I found it cruelly amusing to think of Frodo going the same way.
*** There are no J's in ME. It's crazy.
**** Kaitlin's my friend, she did the first attempt at one
of these poems.
Note in general: I was very very bored.
